7 Quick Takes Friday

Trying my hand at my first Quick Takes ever, via Conversion Diary.  Woohoo!  It's short and not as neat as I'd like, but I'll improve.

 1. The kids' "healthy" salad for supper, sigh..yes that's Ranch dressing...yes, I know.

2. Flylady would be proud.

3.A healthy favorite, California style , and yes I ate it w/ my chopsticks. Be amazed, go ahead :P (this was supposed to go above, with the "salad" photo but for some reason I am having trouble figuring out my smartphone pic/picasa/instagram/blogger/uploading/syncing whatchamacallit.  I am a baby...I am learning...eh.

4. Our new glow in the dark brush,, when chewed by the dog, leaks glow in the dark gel...I wonder if Belle's teeth would glow if we turned the lights out.... brush is now in the trash.

5. Back to Saturday's Ordinations, this special little guy is Doug's godson Peter...the first child of the first priest ordained from the first class of the Anglican Ordinariate.  They have video of him crawling toward a prayer book...the kid has his work cut out for him! :)  And he's oh so cute and sweet to boot! lol

6. This was supposed to be top of my list, since it was from last Friday. (again, the whatchamacallit) At the time, it was a week late too.  It was "Pentecost sundaes" in honor of Pentecost Sunday.  It was just a few of us rare Catholic home schoolers here, and they were rather sad-looking, and I must say, I enjoyed last years' "sundaes" better :)  See more here  and  here (2 of my fav uber-Catholic mom sites lol)

7.  Sorry it's turned sideways, sigh whatchamalcallit again....Flylady would NOT be so proud.  Yeh..so, if there's one thing I do, it's stay on top of the laundry (seriously, sometimes it's the only thing I get to at the house, sigh)....but, when there is an item that has been outgrown and I say, "oh, I need to take that to charity," or maybe I want to save a special outfit and use the material for a recycle project of some sort (one day, I hope)...well, it gets thrown up into a sort of pile on the shelves in my laundry room.  So, there it is...just one more project weighing on my mind daily. LOL  And really it's a minor one in the scheme of things...at least I could shut the door on that room if need be :P  (not brave enough to show you all the other projects yet!)

h3 (vol.3)

Heart's Desire

Along with the platitudes from earlier this week on my soul mate and partner in crime, Douglas, ( Gag, IKR? can you tell though that he's been gone for a week and gets back tomorrow/today!? :) ) I have to add how very much I was gifted with my "heart's desire"....of beautiful, amazing, wonderful kiddos.  All I really ever wanted to be growing up was a mommy.  I know, cliche' right?  But it's true.  Under-achiever? I think not.  I had other career ideas, but....nothing topped motherhood.  I've mentioned at the beginning of all my birth story sharing how I "just knew" I had birthing hips and was going to pop my babies out.  I literally would "play" giving birth with my friends, at times LOL when we played "house."  Oh sure, it was based on silly "birth" scenes I'd seen on tv (who else watched Dallas and other soap operas at too young an age in the '80s WITH your parents, and would NEVER let your children watch that smut now??? LOL) and involved a LOT of panting and "ow's" LOL Ugh.  But yeh....I was afraid of it, but "prepared." Unfortunately that means I figured I'd be one of those who wanted her epidural in the parking lot.  Gah!  But I digress....more birthy stuff later... While I never got to actually GIVE BIRTH the "right" way (my words) and will always grieve that (yes, it's okay to grieve that, many women do!), I did get my ultimate heart's desire.  My children and my vocation.  I do miss a few that are in heaven, you know that.  But...I was beyond blessed with the 3 living I have (so far?  maybe one day there will be more?  not sure...) and they do bring me SO much JOY.  When Doug and I met, we both sort of had this idea in our minds that, if this wasn't the "real deal", we'd scare the other one off by mentioning weddings and lots of children. LOL  Well, it backfired, or rather WORKED, for both of us....we were each others' "heart's desire."  The whole package.  We both wanted a big family, and even knew no matter what, we wanted to adopt.  We just didn't know the "no matter what" would work out the way that it did....but "all things work together for good."  And I pray for many more years of  Joy and Desire :P  Above is the pic I really wanted to upload yesterday but wasn't able to yet.  And you can see my other little "joys" in the margin to the left <----- :)  Now.....pray that I can also be my heart's desire of a GOOD, CALM, PEACEFUL, GENTLE, ATTACHED, AWARE, INVOLVED, HOMESCHOOLING, PRAYERFUL, HOLY mother to them all!  I have not felt calm enough this week, or for a while even, and know I  yell too much!  Lord, mold and shape this lump of clay into YOUR IMAGE!!  

A Heart "CAN"

I have mentioned and will continue to mention part of my other many passions :).... ICAN  and all manner of birth activism, for better safer birth for mothers; infant loss; ppd and ptsd; doula care and midwifery care; and so much more.  And hopefully you've noticed my PINK KIT banner in the upper right hand margin :)  I am working on a post about it for later.  Stay tuned....  Well anyway, you also may know that I am the (struggling) leader of our local ICAN chapter, which I really really hope to do a better job on that really soon. (Like put up flyers, start a bank account, get my EIN, so much more...)  I am glad I have been able to help a few VBAC moms here and there, despite my failings.  Each one reach one, right?  And I have an awesome co-leader (which I keep forgetting to get signed up w/ her free membership we won last year, grr!)  But I digress.... I am excited to say that I sent in my app and was allowed to be the 2013 Conference Speaker Hospitality Chair :)  I am so excited!  I am good at hospitality (especially with other people's money, ....cuz I don't usually have any money to DO hospitality LOL.)  And I love it.  I am also a good mediator.  I can make decisions about other people's stuff, just not my own :)  I can make phone calls that are not personal to me or involve a bank, a bill, or a doctor. :)  Ha!  But seriously, I hope that I can do a good job and am excited about the 2013 Conference next year in Seattle.  I've never been to the West Coast, so that will be super uber exciting!  And this will be my third conference to attend.  My first was super (uber) emotional and hard.  I was about 3 years out from my tragedy w/ Noah, and had a one year old Mariam in tow, so it was hard to fully experience it and appreciate it.  I was mainly there to meet in person for the first time some of my very favorite people on Earth, whom I'd already known online for several years and who had seen me through my grief.  It was bittersweet.  Somewhat painful.  Somewhat disappointing.  But...I didn't give up hope.  And at the end of it, I made the decision to start my own chapter and dive even stronger into birth work.  I found that I had NOT been able to give it up completely....my passion was reignited.  And so,...I attended the next conference 2 years later, on FIRE!  I was fully present, listening to speakers, and brainstorming.  But also healing.   I recommitted my passion for ICAN.  And now...this year?  I am even considering preparing some session ideas with some other mommas and I am again, so excited to be Hospitality Chair, and greet our speakers and make them feel welcome and comfortable.  I have some shopping to do (via phone) too, woohoo!  What's not to love! :)  So...stay tuned, as always.... 

Heart Health

Sometimes "heart health" means spiritual, and sometimes it means emotional/relational, and sometimes it means physical.  Here, I am thinking of the physical.  It's an emotional topic for me.  I feel like I do not want to go public with my weight struggle any more, because....I did that last year on FB and with locals, and after 4 months, crashed and burned. AWKWARD!  Sigh.  I've struggled with my weight and food issues my entire life.  So has Doug.  And now, so do our kids.  I do not know why this is SO HARD for us.  But it just is. I've whined and cried so much about it all.  I am fearful to do that again, (and again) for fear of MORE judgement from others.  But...mostly it's my own judgement of myself, I know.  My vain worries about what other people think of me.  But I AM worried ....I DO worry about my family's health.  We ARE trying.  We try, and fail, and get back up again.  It's all I can do...okay, I know...the tough love says, you don't "try", you "do."  Okay....so pray for us that we CAN "do"....because we DO want to be Heart Healthy so that we can live long happy lives here on earth, God-willing, in service to Him and others.  May HE be glorified!  So thanks for "listening" to my struggles, and ...say it with me, "stay tuned" :).... I hope to share all along a VICTORY in this battle.  (No plan sharing for now, sorry!)

Mother Teresa, pray for us!!

If you want to share your h3 as well, check it out and link back/share with me and Micaela!  (she really needs a widget for easier URL sharing, huh?  hmm...)

what's on your heart? :)

That's What I Said!

Do you always feel that way?  Someone says something and gets credit for the very thought YOU thought of FIRST?  It's my own fault...I don't go immediately write it down and publish it somewhere.  So how can I complain..."whiner!", I say to myself.  Pshh!  Well...my first installment of "That's What I Said!" is here:

I read this article by Dr. Albert Mohler, the President of the Southern Baptist Convention (of which I grew up being a member) and I said, "wow!  They are finally coming around!  And this just may be the thing that leads to uniting us Christians."  Any time Dr. Mohler is speaking on moral issues, my "ears" perk up...ok, my eyes do, when I see him on Facebook. LOL  I can tell he is a deep (Baptist) thinker.  I appreciate it.  I do think, though, where he errs is when he says this:

 At the same time, even as evangelical Christians are helpfully informed by the natural law, our mode of moral reasoning must be deeply biblical, and the Bible must be the ruling authority. For most evangelicals, the major break with Catholic teaching comes at the insistence that "it is necessary that each conjugal act remain ordained in itself to the procreating of human life." That is, that every act of marital intercourse must be fully and equally open to the gift of children. This claims too much, and places inordinate importance on individual acts of sexual intercourse, rather than the larger integrity of the conjugal bond.

Ugh.  Give an inch, they'll take a mile Dr. Mohler.  But that's not the point of my "ugh."  No...really it is a slippish on morality...that leads to the infamous slippery slope.  How is that biblical, kind sir?  Be fruitful and multiply.  Sin of Onan. Yadda Yadda.  If you don't want or need babies at a certain time, do as Paul recommends and "take a break" to greatly paraphrase. LOL  Which is exactly what NFP can do for couples, by the by.  Oh yes, it can, yes it can.  Ask me. ( and too, you err where you say:

 Looking at the Catholic position helps, but evangelicals must also think for themselves, reasoning from the Scriptures in a careful consideration.

This, I know well, is the evangelical/protestant mindset.  As he said very early in his article, paraphrasing, they don't even have a specific "theology" on all of this stuff.  Why?  Because of what he says here...everyone is expected to "think for themselves."  Okay, yes... know that sounds good and all....but....private interpretation of all things theological is what got us in the mess that Christianity is today, with over 80, 000 different denominations all claiming various different beliefs, or some very very similar and they don't even know it.  And, as in my own conversion, what it all comes down to is "by WHO's Authority shall we KNOW the Truth?"  Yes, the Holy Spirit....but working through HIS CHURCH.  Why?  Because the "gates of hell shall not prevail against" Her.  Because Jesus LITERALLY (and figuratively) handed Peter the "keys" to the Kingdom. Because EVERY one needs a leader....a physical human leader, just like our own nation, and every nation on earth, good or bad.....but the Church, we needed one too, in God's  own design, and in his own words, we needed someONE here on earth to be Christ's representative and "right-hand man" so-to-speak.  Okay, you can read more on this elsewhere and all about the Magisterium and why. (Also try here )  My point is...Christ gave us a protector, to keep us all from splitting in a million.  Well, was supposed to...and is still there...the gates have not prevailed...some are just outside the Church, and split...into a million.  Do we have a conscience to follow? yes!  Does the Holy Spirit guide each individual Christian in a personal way?  Yes!  But when that "guidance" begins to stray far from the entire fold...and the historical, biblical Traditions of the Church...it leads...well, astray.  That's not to say the Church doesn't need reform and discipline itself from time to time (from Luther to recent scandals.)  But...core teachings have remained for 2000 years.  And that is my mini-synopsis of the Faith and the Split and our Division and History and all that good stuff. LOL

But getting back to "just" Biblical standards... when Mohler says:

Fourth, Christian couples are not ordered by Scripture to maximize the largest number of children that could be conceived. Given our general state of health in advanced societies, a couple who marries in their early twenties and has a healthy and regular sex life could well produce over fifteen offspring before the wife passes her early forties. Such families should be rightly honored, but this level of reproduction is certainly not mandated by the Bible.

He makes quite the stretch.  No, certainly "be fruitful and multiply" and the blessings of the "arrows" did not "mandate" or "force" a certain high number of children per couple.  Neither did the Church or Pope say that either.  And NFP does not result in that either.  But all of our "advances" in health and society have gotten us to where?  A dying (human) race in many areas. And so, he ends rather quickly by adding what amounts to an "okay" to contracepting.  What little he mentions on the controversy of contracepting vs. abortificients leaves SO much room for error, and
But I digress.   Just how did someone jump the gun on me?  Well, someone far smarter and ....well, yeh, just leave it at smarter LOL....wrote an article about it here 

And now I have had this in draft for so long that its pointless lol so I am just going to messily (that's a word right? Meaning unedited lol) post it anyway. In fact, in the amount of time it took me to work on it the Southern Baptist Convention elected its first ever black president, making big news since it is mostly Southern white men who rule the roost there lol. I will save this topic for another post ...but someone will probably say what I want to say better than I would have before I get to it lol

15 years of this Roller Coaster Ride :)

You know when I mentioned that heart "fonderer" stuff here the other day?  Well....more reason:  today we celebrate 15 years of Holy (happy) Matrimony (Batman!) :)  Here's what I wrote on FB:
‎15 years ago I married my Knight in Shining Armor and best friend :) Doug Martin I'd climb over that 8ft fence all over again, to ride the greatest roller coaster ever :P I don't care if you are at CHWC every year on our anniversary, because a) it's worth it and b) everyday is a celebration for us :) I knew 15 years (and 8 months) ago that we would be in ministry...you by calling, and me by default calling :) So...as Michelle Sutton said, (paraphrasing lol) it's like the military :) you don't always celebrate your birthday or anniversaries together, but ...it doesn't matter......and besides.......you........complete me! ♥

I'll tell you about the 8ft fence, roller coaster and 8 months one day.  For now, I am exhausted and off to bed after an eventful evening w/ Jillian.  She fell in Walmart sigh...and it was my fault.  She was wearing those Birkenstocks I bought her...which were not molded to her foot....as I was warned....and ....she said they were hurting her feet.....and....she wanted to walk in her sock feet in Walmart....and....I figured she wanted to show off her cool blue zebra print toe socks anyway......and....after some perusing I realized I needed to hurry to my next destination.....so I hurried her....she wasn't running though, just walking fast....and.....she slipped, feet just completely from underneath, flat on her back.......and for several long minutes, it'd knocked the wind out of her, she hit so hard.  She couldn't catch her breath and began crying in her hard way.  It probably scared the Walmart staff more than me...I felt she was okay, just in pain....but I was afraid she'd cracked her tailbone.  And....I've always felt that I cracked mine at her age too, but never got it x-rayed.  I remember it being very painful....and re-injuring it several times through the years.  I remember being in so much pain, I could not bend over to pick up my golf ball at Putt-Putt.  And I've always wondered if that was something that affected my labors.....and why the Pink Kit revealed a "wonky" shaped (my words) pelvis.  So....ALL of these thoughts were swirling in my mind as she cried.  They filled out an accident report to cover themselves.  Understandably.  One of the employees saw it happen.  Nothing was their fault.  Fault was all mine (mommy guilt.)  They found a wheelchair and wheeled her to the van.  And then, I took her to the ER.  I just did not want to get home and regret not going in to get her checked out.  What IF....there was a more serious spinal injury?  What IF...she could benefit from some therapy or something?  etc etc  They x-rayed...no breaks.  Just a bruised (compressed?) tailbone.  Phew!  I did get her the liquid lortab, for pain....because I remember that pain.  It's worth it, if she needs it.  Though I pray she won't.  We'll see how she is tomorrow.  Thank you God for insurance for the kids!  Now...please pray for Jillian.  She does seem to be accident prone....and she knows it...  She feels so "unlucky." :(  It breaks my heart.  And I know that I need to get my butt in gear still and get our family in shape.  That would help.  So....pray for me.  Thanks!

Doug left a message tonight for Jillian, voice breaking, that he loves her and is so sorry she got hurt.  Seems the teens and all had an emotional night tonight.  I know lives will be changed!  Pray for them.  And Doug says he has a girl in his group that reminds him a lot of Jillian.  :)  Our sensitive, loving, gentle, courageous, dramatic, funny, beautiful "Baby G"....who is going to be 10 years old in a few short months.    Time flies....thank you Doug for coming into my life and giving me our beautiful children!  I pray for at LEAST 60 more  years :P  Love you so much!

What j is working on

While I work on vbs stuff she is designing a tshiRt :)  and I am trying out my blogger from my uber smart phone...fun fun lol

Attempts

Today...Monday...was a day of "attempts" sigh.  (yes, by my "sigh" I give it away...not gonna be good.)  I ATTEMPTED to get up early (after a night of my mind going a million miles a minute and therefor, not much sleep) and ATTEMPTED to get up to the church to discuss VBS decorations with Jan and do more planning on VBS.  I got about one thing accomplished, and not much to speak of. (Nevermind, that I didn't even ATTEMPT to make it to a Mommy and Me lunch date, sigh)  Then, I ATTEMPTED to go cheap on lunch, while out and about and on the run, w/ 4 kids in tow (said nephew, who btw WAS happy about his tooth fairy money ;) and quickly.  With no air conditioning in the van, we HAD to go inside the restaurant, where Mariam had to shout every other word, and sit in a booster only because I convinced her she was too big for a high chair, all because there was a BABY in the room, which his mom promptly and curtly told Mariam not to touch unless she washed her hands (eh, understood) LOL and....etc etc  Then, I ATTEMPTED to "just run in a minute" to the thrift store to check on a few things I had my eye on, but wouldn't you know it, EVERYTHING in the store was 50% off today until 3pm!!!!  eek!  I got a pair of Birkenstocks for Jillian which she swore were VERY comfortable (I know they aren't molded to HER foot, but eh...) and I got a Tyler Rodan brown leather purse for $4 which I love, and a few other "necessities" ...........I shoulda got that Vera Bradley purse for like $3 too...but that would be greedy of me ..I just needed ONE good all weather/purpose purse (with LOTS of different compartments, squeee!)  Anyhoo....next, I ATTEMPTED to once again work on VBS stuff, but an afternoon water play session ("Mom, we need another towel!!" "Mom, I need more dry clothes!" "MOM!!!!") presented much interruption,  Next, I ATTEMPTED to order pizza online, but in the amount of time it took me to decide, I talked myself out of wasting more money, and we had nachos.  Then, I ATTEMPTED to do some cleaning....we won't go there.  Then, I ATTEMPTED to take whining children to the park, but waited too late for the Rotary Miracle playground (yes it was sundown by this point,sigh), so ATTEMPTED to take everyone's picture at the other park for a blog post brewing in my head....until I couldn't find Micah....and ATTEMPTED to call him....and call him.....and......he finally was found on the other side of the bathrooms behind bushes, hiding from said nephew.  GRRR!  I had just told them not to go where I couldn't see them, it was getting too dark.  He didn't hear me.  He was sorry.  But I ...was done. Sigh.  It had shaken me....angered me....and I was already frustrated by the day.  Mariam was tired from no nap and whiny.  So...here I am...ATTEMPTING to do more work on VBS stuff, and talking myself out of waiting until tomorrow.  ATTEMPTING to convince myself to go ahead and do a load of dishes, even if it makes noise that might wake sleeping children.  Um...no.  Easy.  And...ATTEMPTING to now force myself to go to bed and pray for good sleep, so I can get up in the very early morning (for me) and go pick blueberries with friends!  Here's hoping tomorrow is not just another day of ATTEMPTS.  (please!)  So much to do.....so little time....but glad Doug and the teens are having a great time.  Buenos Noches! (and prayers for everyone!)

h3

Heart Fairy


Well....technically a substitute "tooth fairy" last night :P  but...it's for my nephew..and I love my nephews (and nieces)...and when they stay with us.  Tonight, said nephew lost a tooth (he's 7) and then...we rubbed off on him I guess lol and he literally lost it...so we wrote the tooth fairy a note...Jillian helped him... "Dear Tooth Fairy, I lost my tooth and can I still have some money because I really want some money.  Love, Wesley"

Now, I texted his mom and asked how much to give....but she surely isn't still awake as late as I am lol...so the going-rate here turned out to be $3... inflation really hit when my kids came along (and heard how much their cousins were getting...this began about 6 or 7 yrs ago...)...and they get a LOT more than I used to get, let me tell you (we're talking pocket change, though mostly quarters.)  And yes...the tooth fairy is one of our "guilty pleasures"...on the one hand, I feel too "secular" doing it...on the other, I think of Tolkien and other childhood fantasies that are fun....and say why not?  eh...only one more kid to go and so far no permanent damage.......but anyway, my older two know the TRUTH now, and well....said nephew does not :)  So I got to "play" a little tonight.  And I loved it...and dear nephew will love the $3 (well, hopefully his normal tooth fairy wouldn't dream of giving him more than that per tooth! :P) 




Heart-inspiring!


This past Saturday, I was blessed to be able to attend and take Micah to our diocese's Ordination Mass for this year.  5 Seminarians and 1 (the 1st in the USA! our good friend Father Matthew Venuti) Anglican Ordinariate became Catholic priests!  (you will be hearing more on that in the future) And one new deacon!  I rode down with a friend and 3 other kids to Mobile ("on a 3 hr tour, a 3 hour tour.." lol) ...the Cathedral was so beautiful (did you see October Baby?  yeh, the one she goes in to pray... :)  it's a minor Basilica...if you don't know about this rare honor (well rare as in over 1500 in the world), read here , down to the bottom....an honor bestowed by the Pope.  Anyway....this Mass had all the "bells and smells" :)  which means, to me, it was BEAUTIFUL and awe-inspiring.  


Heart Fonderer(erer..)

A stretch? lol  Well...here's my thinking... "absence makes the heart grow fonder"....so....my heart is growing ...er,..."fonderer and fonderer" this week :P LOL    ..........Because it is Catholic HEART Workcamp week, which means Doug is gone for a week, taking our kids to Chicago this year.  It's an amazing time for the teens...and adults too, as they watch the teens go through it....  And this year is extra special being in Chicago...just sounds more fun in the "windy city" than the sweltering hot places they've been before LOL   But anyhoo....so...I don't sleep well the weeks Doug is gone...and yes, I miss the "ol' man" :P  So....my heart is growing......fonderer :P  BTW the pic is us on our honeymoon....see the GLOW on our faces :)  Ahh...l'amore!  lol 


Now, check out Micaela's  h3  :)  What's on YOUR "heart" today?